Nicofiend: Why smokers are the lepers of the world.

I couldn’t be described as anything but a regular and heavy smoker. It is not something I am particularly proud of, nor is it something I feel too much shame over- it is simply, for the moment, how it is.
And of course, lectures come in both ears about how it is killing you and how its costing you money and how you should quit right now, if at all possible.
This harassment comes, more often that not, from non-smokers; those who can’t possibly comprehend the joy of a cigarette, from time to time.
I hole no illusions that it is a cool or glamorous habit, that all died with Bogart, but it is something that helps me level out, and in my mind at very least, eases some sort of tension.
Well, besides life being to stressful to ever quit, and the fact that of course all smokers know of the dangers it is not simply a matter of chucking away the cigs.
As any smoker knows cigarettes are to be enjoyed with an array of other activities and substances, and it is for this reason, I can’t quit. These activities and substances are:

1. Coffee-
As much of a nicofiend as I am, caffeine is right there with it. If I go the day without a cup I can be expected to be asleep by the mid afternoon. And there is nothing better than a cig with a hot cup of coffee, so, if I were to give up cigs, id also have to give up coffee.

2. Booze-
The drunker you get, the more smokes you crave. I am at my chain-smoking best when I am 10 beers for the better. How often do smokers wish to be outdoors at the various drinking venues they frequent, for no other reason than to puff, puff, puff. So, id also have to give up drinking. Shucks!

3. Sex-
Having just enjoyed the most carnal of delights, feeling drained and happy is the perfect time to light up. As your nerves tingle and twitch and you come back to earth…in and out. Ho Hum.

4. Food-
As a passionate smoker, you find your interest in food goes. But when you are hungry, the best way to cap off a meal is with a cigarette.

5. Anxiety Attacks-
Of course I would love to be rid of these pesky devils, but as it is, it is out of my hands. And so, when one strikes, I must be sure to have my Bensons for medicine.

To give up those things would be a virtual impossibility for someone as stuck in life as I am. I have no doubt though, one day, the world will be more balanced and I will be able to throw my dirty little habit down the shitter where, most would argue, it belongs.
Of course there are natural drawbacks to;
Stairs are now my enemy, I break a sweat when I check the mail, I am the leper of high society and smell like an ashtray 24 hours a day, my fingers and teeth are a healthy yellow and the shower is as much a means to stay hygienic as a daily coughing fit.
Still, oral fixations and turbulent times as they are, this isn’t enough to break the habit. Yet.
NP.