Sunday, February 22, 2015

When Writing Fucks You, Hard.



My complicated relationship with language came along in my very young years. I had, at that time, no compulsion to words; except for the fact that I liked writing bad poetry. I suppose I still do. I wrote of my fathers friends mainly and I don't think my verse was too shabby. Here's a slice:

Heres To Stan.
Heres to Stan, we love stan
Heres to Stan, to Stan
The Handicapped man.

I read the poem to my old man who pointed out something very important. Pretty obvious what it was.
'Handicapped means like, disabled' he said, in a political correctness that didn't quite compute with the time. Cripple was still a survivor in those days,
But here is the thing, I was raised in an iron-clad circle of blue-collar workers. Handy, or being handy, was a thing of almost nobility, of virtue. In my brain then, handy-man was a good thing to be.
We were working-class, solved problems domestically, caused problems domestically but always handled our own. Obviously we needed doctors, but being as self sufficient as possible was a real pride point. And paying some arsehole to do a basic was about as emasculating as it got. Get a mate to do it and piss it up. Maybe not correct, but this was the ethic and one I can't fully escape.
And so handy entered my vocabulary as something of pride. Handicapped seemed to further it and work with my rhyme scheme, so clearly I was chuffed. Then, as things do, the truth hit me. I was calling a member of the extended coal family a disabled guy. Though a devastating case of pot abuse and cuntiness eventually proved me right, my failure in language rings on to this day.
And on to exhibit two.
There was a time, in Catholic school, when the idea of secret notes appealed to me. I had a teacher, who I shan't name because I don't remember her name (though it was certainly something Italian), who wore toro red lipstick. She also wore pencil skirts, had a disastrous 90s haircut and wore crisp red suit jackets. It was grade three and might have been my first sexual experience, though it was probably just a case of me liking her as a teacher (as a friend, though I was a catch back then).
Regardless I spent the entirety of an evening writing and re-writing a letter to her. I worked it in and out, much more than I do today, making it just right. Then I signed it.
Feeling proud I recruited my old man as an audience. He absently nodded along with the letter until I got to the sign off. What was the sign off? From your secret admirer.
'That means that you, like, love her' the old man explained, half-pissed.
'But I do Dad' I cheered, thinking he had got my point.
'No like, you want to kiss her. Like me and mum.'
I was horrified, I thought it only meant something platonic. I was in love with the teacher and the world was over for me.
Exhibit 3.
Another poem. I was big on poetry at one time though I mainly enjoyed coming up with the rhymes. Couplets were a thing of beauty to me. Coming up with the right one and getting the syllables in order. A thrill when you hit it right, I didn't draw.
But here is another slice of my pre-teen poetry that highlights my point:

Dad and Tim like footy and cricket
But I think we should just fricket.

Inventiveness is next to godliness. Artists learn from their previous art and this is a lesson in the value of an extremely cringe-worthy piece. My dad, who had stopped being a literary critic and started being a drunk again actually loved this piece, in all its infantile charm.
I still have issues. Paramount amongst them is how I was so eager to bastardise a word that early. I'd heard the 'friggin this' and 'friggin that'. I had also heard many 'fucks' but knew enough to know that 'fuck it' did not fit the symmetry of this piece.
Secondly, I criticised two things that are now dear to me. I know that at one time they were a good excuse for a piss-up and so a good distraction for the old man. This is, I guess, why I suggested we should 'fricket'.
Though in retrospect I love both games and wish away any idea of 'fricketing' it. They are both still good excuses for a piss-up and now I understand.
But those things led me to write on, for some reason, and are the reason you are reading this now.
Language still bugs me, luckily I am super handicapped at it.


NP.

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